Why and how the text could be Bavarian

[ololololo]

It's not like I just translated three words and say that's the solution. There are hundreds of statistical tests and analyses behind it. I'd love to publish them all, but who's going to read all that?

Those who will be interested in it
I think you're right that there aren't many people here who understand cryptology. For some reason, most of the solutions here avoid the idea of a cipher, offering other, sometimes intricate, ideas. I think it has to do with the fact that VMS is explores by non-professionals. They tend to find solutions that are easy to understand (for them) and that they can accept more easily than complex cryptological analyses.
But that's no reason to despair... If the world is plunged into darkness, then become a flashlight!

But it can also work the other way around: other people’s theories must be wrong because they can’t be true—since that would undermine one’s own theory.

I don't know if I'm right or not. If I create even the most consistent solution possible, I won't know if I'm actually right. To find out, I'd have to invent a time machine and ask the author to evaluate my work. So I won't be so categorical.
But if it happens, I'll definitely let you all know. I hope I don't have to decipher the VMS author's speech...